


A Shot of Inaccuracy

by deathbyspaceglam



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016)
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Bodhi Rook Week 2017, Drinking Games, M/M, Post RotJ, Post War, Post-Canon, this is kind of like the ember island players episode of atla only with rogue one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-17
Updated: 2017-04-17
Packaged: 2018-10-20 06:32:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,448
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10656888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deathbyspaceglam/pseuds/deathbyspaceglam
Summary: A year after the end of the war, the Rogue One crew watch a movie about themselves.





	A Shot of Inaccuracy

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Bodhi Rook Week with the prompt “Bodhi and Rogue One crew bonding.”  
> Clarification: The movie they watch isn’t the actual Rogue One movie. It’s a really shitty in-universe version of it.

Nobody could believe that a year ago, the war had ended. The anniversary was celebrated throughout the whole galaxy- fireworks were lit, toasts were raised, heroes’ names were honored. Everyone knew about the Death Stars, about who took down their shields and who destroyed them. Everyone knew that Luke Skywalker had destroyed the first Death Star, and they had some idea about how Leia Organa had struggled to get the Death Star plans into the Alliance’s hands, but almost nobody knew how the plans had been stolen from the Empire in the first place.

Bodhi watched through the apartment window as fireworks lit the night sky. _At least Sabine is having fun_ , he thought, remembering the firey look that had always crossed her face whenever she'd set off explosions.

As a firecracker fizzed in the distance, Jyn burst into the living room. “You won’t believe what I found!” she announced.

Cassian stood up from the couch. “What is it?”

Using a mini-holoprojector, Jyn projected a movie poster. “There’s a movie about us,” she explained. “About how we stole the plans for the Death Star. We can watch it tonight if you’d all like.”

K-2SO eyed the poster critically. “Are you completely sure that watching this movie is the best idea?” he said. “There is a 26% chance that any of us will be represented in any way nearing accuracy.”

“I don’t know, Kay,” said Bodhi. “Nobody ever talks about us. It would be interesting to see what stories about us there are.”

“Well, I will take no part in this,” said K-2 before leaving the room. As he left, he added, “Tell me later if the movie is any good.”

\---

As Jyn and Bodhi finished setting things up in the screening room, Cassian entered the room, with Baze following closely behind. “Aren’t you supposed to pay for those?” he asked, noticing the source of the movie.

Jyn rolled her eyes. “Do you want to watch a bad movie about ourselves or not?” she said, sitting in a chair close to the holoprojector.

“Come on, it’ll be interesting,” said Bodhi, looking into his boyfriend’s eyes. “You always talked about wanting to leave a legacy.”

“Okay, fine,” Cassian conceded, his face breaking into a soft smile. He sat with Bodhi on a couch between Jyn and the couch where Baze had just settled.

Chirrut entered the room last, carrying two bottles and five shot glasses. As he set them down on the table, Baze sighed. “No,” he said pre-emptively.

“Movies haven’t exactly been the best with portraying Rebellion heroes,” Chirrut stated in explanation. “I’m just making sure that nobody has to go to the liquor cabinet in the middle of the movie.”

Jyn eyed the liquor, no doubt wondering what sort of drinking game could be played with this movie. Bodhi looked around at his companions. He himself didn’t drink and wasn’t going to participate in any drinking game. Back when he was still an Imperial cargo pilot, his fellow pilots sometimes played drinking games. They’d always been especially rowdy when they were drunk. He wondered what it would be like now to be surrounded by drunk friends, friends he’d grown especially close to in the past six years, in the peaceful home environment of their apartment.

“Shall we start the movie?” asked Jyn. When the others murmured assent, she pressed play.

The movie opened with a wide shot introducing the planet Lah’mu. Immediately, an Imperial shuttle flew across the screen, flanked by several troop transports. The ships landed on a wide, sprawling farm on the planet’s surface. Immediately, troopers in white armor began to flood out of the transports and search the area.

“That’s not how I remember it...” said Jyn, an edge of suspicion in her voice.

The projection cut to a shot inside the Ersos’ home. A middle-aged man, who Bodhi supposed was Galen, watched the window nervously. His wife, Lyra, consoled a little girl in the foreground.

There was a knock at the door, followed by a trooper threatening to break the door down. Galen muttered a quick explanation to his wife before leaving the house. As he went with the troopers, Jyn peeked nervously through the window.

What followed was a scene where Galen tried unsuccessfully to shake off the troopers, followed by Lyra going after him and seeing Orson Krennic emerge onto a hilltop, a white rag clearly meant to be his cape blowing in the wind. The black-shelled Death Troopers around him muttered indistinctly. A firefight broke out between Lyra and the troopers and she was shot down. In the aftermath, Galen was forced at blasterpoint onto the Imperial shuttle. Troopers searched the house and the surrounding farms, but there was no sign of Jyn. The holo began to fade into the next scene.

The real Jyn paused the movie. “Okay, I’ve decided what drinking game we can play,” she said. “Whenever I’m given a quote or task that someone else originally had, take a shot.”

Cassian nodded. “You said you were raised by Saw Gerrera. Would this be the first shot, since there’s no sign of him?”

“Since it’s assumed I raised myself, yes,” said Jyn, popping open a bottle of liquor and pouring herself a glass. “Who else wants to play?”

Cassian eagerly poured himself a glass. Bodhi declined, but watched with interest as Jyn poured Chirrut a glass. Baze looked around, sighed, and poured himself a glass as well.

The movie continued, and the drinking game was quickly amended to include instances of Galen getting a quote or task that someone else originally had, because it showed Galen bringing the message instead of Bodhi- in fact, while Cassian, K-2, Chirrut, and Baze all appeared in the movie, Bodhi couldn’t see anyone who resembled himself.

On Eadu, after Galen’s death, Jyn (who didn’t look quite as shaken up as the real Jyn had when her father had died) somehow convinced an Imperial cargo pilot who vaguely resembled Bodhi to fly them all back to base. Everyone shook their heads as they drank. Bodhi groaned loudly.

Back on base, Jyn tried to convince the Alliance to run a mission to Scarif to steal the Death Star plans. She said that rebellions were built on hope. “I said that first,” said Cassian bitterly, tipping back his glass.

When Jyn’s request was denied and she and the others decided to fly to Scarif anyway, it was Jyn who came up with the callsign of Rogue One. “Can’t I do anything?” asked Bodhi.

Jyn reached out and clumsily patted him on the shoulder. “Bodhi, sweetie, I’m so sorry,” she said.

As the mission to Scarif played out in the holo, Bodhi barely paid attention beyond noting that any actual battling happened in the periphery as all the focus was on Jyn, Cassian, and K-2. Instead, he noticed how Baze leaned back with his eyes closed, having stopped drinking somewhere around the return to Yavin 4. He had one arm around Chirrut, who was curled around him, still holding his glass and taking small sips from it whenever he heard Jyn or Cassian drink. Drinking in excess didn’t seem to be the main objective in this game, but rather, dulling the senses just enough to get any kind of enjoyment out of the movie. Much as Bodhi hated the bastardization of the story of Rogue One, he had to admit that the music was really good.

Hearing celebratory screams from the holoprojector, Bodhi turned to face the holo. The Alliance fleet had just gotten the plans and were hastily copying them onto a disc. The Death Star was getting ready to fire on Scarif. Cassian and Jyn were staggering out onto the beach and settling down on the sand.

As the Death Star fired, Jyn and Cassian kissed. Immediately, the real Jyn shouted “I’M GAY!” She grabbed the open bottle of liquor and chugged whatever was left of it.

Cassian weakly tried to cover Bodhi’s eyes. “I’m sorry,” he slurred. “That never happened… I love you…”

Bodhi moved Cassian’s hand away from his eyes, pressing a kiss against his fingers. “It’s okay,” he said. “It’s okay.”

Chirrut sat up and tipped back his glass, draining the last few drops. “I’m blind, anyone care to fill me in?”

Baze sighed. “Loving Cassian was given to Jyn instead of Bodhi,” he said quietly.

As the end credits were projected, K-2 came into the room and took one look at the humans sprawled on the couches in varying states of inebriation. “It wouldn’t have pleased me to have wasted any time watching this movie with you,” he said. “The chance of any of you getting up successfully is 32%."

**Author's Note:**

> The movie versions of them survived, but the viewers were too drunk or otherwise occupied to notice.


End file.
